Escape to Paradise: Hotel Hohe Flum, Schopfheim's Hidden Gem!
Escape to Paradise? Hotel Hohe Flum, Schopfheim: My Unfiltered Take!
Alright, buckle up buttercups, because I’m about to spill the beans on the Hotel Hohe Flum in Schopfheim. Forget the glossy brochure; this is the raw, unadulterated truth, from someone who's spent more time in dodgy hotel rooms than I care to admit. Is it an escape to paradise? Well, let's just say it's… an experience.
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First off, the accessibility situation: they say they’ve got facilities for disabled guests, but I always take that with a grain of salt. Always. I didn't personally need wheelchair access (thank God!), but I poked around. They do have an elevator, so that's a good start. But, honestly, I'd need a proper in-depth view from someone with mobility issues before feeling confident. Just saying.
Rambling about accessibility, ah, okay… This reminds me of that time I tried to help my Aunt Mildred navigate a hotel with a ramp that looked more like a death trap. Anyway, just be sure to double-check those details if you really need them. Don't trust a brochure. Ask questions. Like, lots of questions.
Internet is a big deal, right? YES! Free Wi-Fi in all rooms? Music to my ears! You know, when you gotta work, got to stay connected, got to stream some trashy TV to drown out the existential dread…it's all good. The internet [LAN] was also available, which is nice for the old-school techies, but honestly, who uses that anymore? The Wi-Fi in public areas was decent too. No complaints there.
Let's get to the good stuff: the "things to do, ways to relax, spa" section. Yesss! This is where things get interesting. They’ve got a spa, apparently. I mean, the brochure lists a whole host of treatments: Body scrub, Body wrap, Massage, Sauna, Spa/sauna, Steamroom, Pool with view, Swimming pool [outdoor]… Sounds phenomenal, right?
My Day at the Spa: A Comedic Tragedy
Okay, so here's the thing. I went for the massage. I'm not a spa person. Never have been. But this hotel seemed to demand it. I envisioned myself, relaxed, tension melting away. HA!
The reality? Let's just say it was… memorable. The masseuse, bless her heart, seemed to be more of a… enthusiastic kneader than a skilled masseuse. I swear, I emerged from that room feeling like I’d been tenderized for a schnitzel. I’m talking about muscles that knew they were there. The pool with a view was nice, though. That was a highlight. And the sauna was definitely a sauna, with all the expected sweating and silent contemplation. The steamroom? Fine, nothing to write home about.
Important note: The “View” part with the pool I saw a little kid splash another kid into the pool. Then more kids started splashing. Then, a family of four, each wearing a towel with the Hotel High Flum logo. This was a scene!
On the other hand: I would give them points for hygiene. Cleanliness and safety matters these days, right? They had all the boxes checked: Anti-viral cleaning products, Daily disinfection in common areas, Hand sanitizer everywhere, Hot water linen and laundry washing, Individually-wrapped food options, Physical distancing of at least 1 meter, Professional-grade sanitizing services, Rooms sanitized between stays, Safe dining setup. It actually felt safe. Staff trained in safety protocols too. I saw them constantly wiping down surfaces.
Food, glorious food! Dining, drinking, and snacking:
Okay, the food. Here’s where things get even more interesting. The restaurant? It offered a Buffet in restaurant, Breakfast [buffet], A la carte in restaurant, European cuisine in restaurant, Asian cuisine in restaurant, Vegetarian restaurant… Okay, so the buffet was okay, a bit…meh. Don’t get me wrong, they got all the basics covered, but it wasn’t exactly gourmet. I did have some decent Coffee/tea in restaurant. I mean, it got my engine started. But a lot of the food felt… mass-produced. The Asian cuisine I actually didn’t try, so I can’t tell you about that either.
Side note: I once stayed at a hotel that advertised “authentic Italian cuisine” and what I got was a microwaved pizza. Never again.
Then there was the Poolside bar. I'm just going to say it: the cocktails were weak. Very weak. But, hey, the view was nice, and it was a perfect spot to watch the sun set and pretend I was sophisticated.
Moving on to the Services and Conveniences
They have a 24-hour doorman, concierge, dry cleaning, elevator, luggage storage, the usual suspects. The gift shop was cute, but honestly, a little overpriced. They had a convenience store, which I raided for snacks at 2 AM one night. The daily housekeeping was efficient, and my room always looked spick and span.
For the kids: Family/child friendly From what I could see: they had Kids meal, Babysitting service, Kids facilities. I did notice a family with children there, but didn’t see anyone taking advantage of the babysitting service.
My Room: The Comfort Zone (or Not)
My room was Available in all rooms: Air conditioning, Alarm clock, Bathrobes, Bathroom phone, Bathtub, Blackout curtains, Carpeting, Closet, Coffee/tea maker, Complimentary tea, Daily housekeeping, Desk, Extra long bed, Free bottled water, Hair dryer, High floor, In-room safe box, Interconnecting room(s) available, Internet access – LAN, Internet access – wireless, Ironing facilities, Laptop workspace, Mini bar, Mirror, Non-smoking, On-demand movies, Private bathroom, Reading light, Refrigerator, Safety/security feature, Satellite/cable channels, Scale, Seating area, Separate shower/bathtub, Shower, Slippers, Smoke detector, Socket near the bed, Sofa, Soundproofing, Telephone, Toiletries, Towels, Umbrella, Visual alarm, Wake-up service, Wi-Fi [free], Window that opens.
The bed was actually very comfortable, the blackout curtains were a godsend, and the coffee/tea maker was a lifesaver. The mini bar was, as always, overpriced, but hey, that's the hotel life. I liked the seating area and the desk. I'm always working.
The Imperfections
Let's be honest: The Hotel Hohe Flum is not perfect. It's a little… rustic. Some of the decor is a bit dated. The service, while friendly, can sometimes be a little… slow. And there were, ahem, a few questionable noises coming from the room next door at 3 AM one morning. Sigh.
The Verdict?
Would I recommend the Hotel Hohe Flum? It depends. If you're looking for a perfectly polished, five-star experience, this ain't it. However, if you’re after a comfortable, relatively budget-friendly stay in the Black Forest, with a decent spa, a lovely view (from the pool, at least!), and a generous helping of character, then give it a shot. Just go in with realistic expectations and a healthy dose of humor. And maybe, just maybe, bring your own masseuse… or at least a really good book.
Overall Rating: ★★★☆☆ (Three Stars – Could be better, but not terrible!)
Escape to Paradise: Jeju's Kkothyanggi Badasori Pension Awaits!
Alright, buckle up buttercups! You’re in for a rollercoaster ride of a trip to Hotel Hohe Flum in Schopfheim, Germany. I’m not promising polished travel writing, more like a slightly singed, definitely caffeinated journal entry. Prepare for… well, let’s just see where this goes, shall we?
Day 1: Arrival and… Immediate Mild Panic (and Delicious Cheese)
Morning (6:00 AM, Berlin): Wake up. Or rather, attempt to wake up. My alarm clock, bless its digital heart, thinks I’m a morning person. I’m not. I'm a "hit snooze five times and then bolt out of bed five minutes before the taxi arrives" kind of person. This trip, I swear, it's going to be different. It's going to be… serene. (Narrator voice: It was not.)
Plane Journey (9:00 AM): Flight to Basel, Switzerland. Flight delayed an hour. My carefully crafted itinerary, already looking like a chewed-up dog toy. Spent the delay desperately trying to find an outlet at the airport. Found one! But it was broken. Sigh.
Border Crossing (12:00 PM): Basel airport. Border control? Easy peasy. That is, until the border agent, a man who looked like he personally invented the word "stern," asked me about my "travel purpose." My immediate and honest response? "To eat cheese, drink wine, and hopefully avoid any awkward conversations." He didn't laugh. I was relieved when he let me pass.
The Train Ride (1:00 PM): Basel SBB to Schopfheim. Swiss trains? Incredibly punctual and clean and efficient. So much so, it made me feel… slightly inadequate. Like the train was judging my travel messiness. The scenery, though? Gorgeous. Rolling hills, impossibly neat houses, and cows that looked like they'd been professionally groomed. I swear, I almost pulled out my phone for an Instagram story, but then thought, Nah, let's just enjoy it. (Narrator voice: That lasted about five minutes.)
Hotel Hohe Flum (3:00 PM): Arrived! Finally. The hotel is picture-postcard perfect. Like, seriously. Mountains, cozy-looking buildings, and a charming little courtyard. Check-in was… efficient. The woman at the desk, bless her heart, was probably very pleased with her ability to speak several languages, and not happy that I was so clearly flustered. The room is lovely, classic, and a little bit… empty of personality. That's what I'm here for, right? To fill it with mine!
Initial Reconnaissance (4:00 PM): Wandered around the hotel. Found the restaurant. The smell! Oh, the smell of roasting meat and something intensely cheesy. Lunch was… a necessity. The cheese plate.. It was just a simple selection of local cheeses, bread, and a side of pickle. I devoured it with gusto. I'm pretty sure I could have eaten a second cheese plate. Maybe I should. I'm probably going to. I'll report back.
Evening (6:00 PM): The town exploration! Schopfheim is a quaint little town. I wandered around the shops and then went back to the room with my treasure. I think I want to go back to the cheese plate!
Dinner (7:30 PM) Hotel Restaurant: The restaurant is nice, the food is also good. I tried a local wine. The waiter was charming, and in great contrast to the check-in lady.
Day 2: The Baden-Württemberg Bliss and the Forest Fiasco
Morning (8:00 AM): Woke up! Not feeling too terrible, considering. Also, thank God for coffee. Breakfast at the hotel was a buffet – always a sign of both promise and potential disaster. Went straight for the scrambled eggs. They were surprisingly good.
Day Trip to a Black Forest Town (9:30 AM): Decided to explore the Black Forest. This was the plan – perfect, smooth, planned. The reality? I got slightly lost. Twice. Once in the hotel's parking lot trying to find the car, and then again on the road. My sense of direction is… aspirational. And my GPS, as I've learned the hard way, is only helpful when it feels like it.
The Town (11:00 AM): Finally, found the town. So gorgeous. Everything is so well-maintained and historic. Wandered for a while, took photos of the clock, the cuckoo clock, and the charming bridges. The whole place felt like something out of a fairy tale. Maybe that's why I got so lost! I should have taken a photo of the parking lot before leaving, haha.
Lunch (1:00 PM): Found a traditional restaurant. The portions were… German. Massive. Hearty. Delicious. I ordered the Schnitzel. The schnitzel was also massive and also very good. Ate until I could barely breathe. Worth it.
Afternoon: The Forest Fiasco (3:00 PM): Decided to take a hike in the Black Forest. "It will be beautiful," I thought. "I will commune with nature," I hoped. "I will get lost again!" I probably should have seen it, but I did not. I managed to lose a water bottle, a hat, and my sense of perspective. I am happy I found a trail, because in the end, I was so lost that I began to be scared, but was able to find my way out.
Back to the Hotel (6:00 PM): Tired and muddy and with a few extra scratches. That was my plan, I suppose. Back to the hotel and to a nice, hot bath. And, later, a nice dinner.
Dinner (7:30 PM): This time, I had the soup. It was excellent. And now I have to sleep.
Day 3: Rest and Relaxation
- Morning (9:00 AM): Breakfast, slowly, this time. This morning's agenda? Nothing. Absolutely nothing.
- Spa time (10:00 AM): I had a massage. It was heavenly, and now am ready to go on with my next adventure.
- Afternoon (1:00 PM): I went to the hotel shop and took some time to unwind.
- Dinner (7:30 PM): I will have some delicious food with some friends, just to share this great experience!
Day 4: Departure (and Maybe a Cheese Plate Before I Go?)
- Morning (8:00 AM): The last breakfast. It's a bittersweet moment.
- Pack up (9:00 AM): All the things I packed with.
- Check Out (10:00 AM): Goodbye, Hotel Hohe Flum. You were… an experience. The cheese plate, you certainly had my heart.
- Departure (11:00 AM): Train to Basel!
- Flight Home (2:00 PM): Hope the plane is on time. I'm craving cheese already. This time, I am coming to the airport early.
P.S. If you ask me, this trip was a complete mess. But it was my mess. And I wouldn’t trade it for anything. Also, if anyone knows the recipe for that cheese plate, please, send it my way.
**OYO Hotel Lebanon, MO: Your Perfect I-44 Getaway!**
So, what *is* this thing about? I'm lost already.
Honestly? I'm not entirely sure *what* I'm talking about. It's just…stuff. The big stuff, the little stuff – the stuff that keeps us up at 3 AM replaying that *one* conversation? Life, basically. And its beautiful, messy, glorious *everything-ness*. I'm winging it, folks. Prepare yourselves.
Okay, okay, what's the *point* of all this rambling?
The point? Uh…good question. Let's be honest, I don't *always* have a point. Sometimes, I just need to get the noise out of my head. But maybe, just *maybe*, if I stumble around long enough, I'll accidentally say something that resonates with *you*. Or make you laugh. Failing that, at least it’s good practice, right? Trial by fire. Or, in my case, trial by rambling.
Is this supposed to be... helpful?
Helpful? Oh, honey, I make no promises. I’m just…here. Look, if you’re expecting solid advice, go to a therapist. If you *want* commiseration and a healthy dose of "me too!"? Yeah, maybe I can help. Maybe. I'm good at the second-guessing, anyway. Or, you know, *not* helping. Depends on if you're asking about what to do after a breakup, or if you just want to know if anyone else finds folding fitted sheets to be a personal affront to the gods. (Spoiler alert: I do.)
What's the deal with *you*? Who are *you* supposed to be, anyway?
Me? Ugh. I'm just a person, alright? A person who's probably had way too much coffee. I’m the friend who’ll tell you that your haircut looks good *even if it slightly doesn’t*. The one who cries at commercials for dog food. I'm just trying to figure out how to adult without completely melting down, which I fail at...*regularly*.
Okay, let's get to the *real* stuff: What's the hardest thing about life, in your humble (and probably wrong) opinion?
Oh, that's easy. Hands down? *Dealing with other people*. Seriously. I love people. Truly. But sometimes, like, *sometimes*, the sheer *volume* of opinions, expectations, and…well, *stuff* that people bring to the table makes me want to retreat to a cabin in the woods with a mountain of books and zero WiFi. It's exhausting! Think about it: navigating relationships, family, the office, and the grocery store where someone *always* blocks the damn avocados. It's a battlefield, I tell you. And I haven't even brought up social media. Ugh.
What's something you've learned the hard way? Spill.
Ugh, where do I begin? Okay, okay, this is a good one: *Don't lend money to friends.* I know, I know, clichéd. But let me tell you about the time I was young and *naive* and thought I was helping a friend out. A friend, mind you, who then proceeded to ghost me for three months *after* the due date. Lesson learned: friendship is precious, but it doesn't pay the bills! The worst part? That particular loan was for a "business venture" involving a self-watering terrarium that, surprise, never actually *watered itself*. The irony is sharp, and the anger is still there. I'm still salty about that terrarium, truly. And it taught me a huge lesson about boundaries. And the inherent shoddiness of self-watering systems. And the *importance* of having a good emergency fund.
What's something you're *good* at? (Besides, you know, rambling)
Okay, ego check. Hmm… I'm *really* good at finding the perfect comfort food for any given emotional state. Like, *master-level* good. Sad? Ice cream. Stressed? Pizza. Happy? More ice cream! Also, I can do a killer impression of my cat begging for food. So... that's a skill, I guess. It's a useful one, at least in my house.
What's something you're… *not* so good at?
Oh, let's see. Public speaking. Definitely public speaking. And parallel parking. And, frankly, taking the high road. I’m perpetually stuck in the "low road," I’m afraid. Also, I am terrible at remembering people's names. I’m the kind of person who will refer to you as “That person with the…thing.” You know, *the* thing. And I’m terrible at those complicated recipes that require all the fancy ingredients and a food processor, especially if it has multiple steps. Give me mac and cheese any day. *Simplicity*. It's the key.
What's something that makes you *genuinely* happy?
Okay, this one’s easy. A good book, a warm cup of coffee on a rainy day, and a genuine, belly-laughing conversation with a close friend. Oh, and the feeling of freshly washed sheets! *Heaven*. Seriously, the simple things. Sometimes, I feel guilty about *enjoying* the simple things so much. Is that weird? Does anyone else get that?
What's your philosophy on... life?
My philosophy? Oh, wow. Deep stuff! Uh… it's basically this: Try to be kind. Try to be present. And eat the damn cake. Seriously. Life's too short to worry about calories, or what other people think. Make mistakes. Do stupid things. Learn from them. And maybe, just maybe, find a little joy in the chaos. Oh, and when in doubt, *blame the cat.*. Just kidding! Kinda.
Any final words of wisdom? (Don’t make me regretStay Finder Review
